Developmental Community: Good’s Long Game:

The Four Characteristics of Nurturance Community

  Every Nurturance Community is: 

1. Bonded:.  The Bond is uniquely strong which is why parents are often so fiercely protective of their children even when those children stress the household.  “How could anyone love that child?” asks one person and the Bond answers back “don’t know, but I do”.  The Bond is  ultimately hard to define because it is founded and built on mystery.  Anything else is too limiting for the explosive development of infants and the very young. 
2. Non-conditional:  The Nurturance bonded relationship is not a behavior contract.  The bonded relationship is non-conditional rather  unconditional because sometimes, even for the very young, situations arise that are actually dangerous and the family might need to separate out for sorting and safety.  Non-conditionality takes banishment and abandonment off the table and the child grows with a large field in which to play, learn and make mistakes.  You might lose your screen time, but the child must never face alienation (intentional ghosting). The harder work of the non-conditional approach  creates for the child a capacity for faith and trust in the world.
3. Outside of Time:  The Nurturance Community respects and protects individual rhythms of development (emerging circadian rhythm) as much or more than the clock’s demands. We will discuss Vocational Community later and in that community the central roles the clock and time. 
4. Grieved upon ending:   Your nurturers often follow you to the end of either your or their lives  but good or bad, these bonded relationships almost always trigger grief upon ending.